Motherhood is a Huge Time Zapper!

I remember when my son lost his very first tooth. A funny thing happened, he swallowed the tooth – which made for a little pickle when I tried to figure out how we were going to do the whole “tooth fairy” thing!
Daddy wrote a note to the tooth fairy explaining the situation and – good news – the tooth fairy did indeed show up!  But not without my husband and I first having a discussion about the going rate for a tooth these days. My husband suggested a pretty high price – I on the other hand tend to be cheap, so I threw out a low bid and we ended up in the middle.
Considering the costdo you realize how much these kids have cost us? I’m not even talking about money here – I’m talking about time and energy!
Before I had my first child, I thought the hard part was going to be the pregnancy and delivery. Boy, was I wrong!  First it was my nursing struggles ,which I shared on Monday, and NOW the hardest part for me is taking the time and energy to train my children to do what is right.
The wise mother takes the time to correct her children over and over and over again so they can experience the peace and freedom of living a life in accordance to God’s word and in peace with God and others. But this takes something very BIG – OUR TIME!
How are we doing with spending time with our kids? I have felt myself tempted to get the kids outside so I can get my work done inside. I have felt the pull of trying to get the kids in bed early so I can find some “me” time. These things are not wrong in and of themselves – but it is wrong if we spend the entire day – just corralling them like cattle from one activity to another and never spending real quality time with them during their day. 
Our children need their mommy’s time. They need us to take the time to look into their little eyes and tell them they are loved. They need us to just sit and listen to their goofy story. They need us to look up the answer to that weird question they have, that we don’t know the answer to – but they are really interested in. And they NEED us to take the time to read them God’s word and train them to do what is right.
Deuteronomy 6:7 says it is the parents job to teach our children God’s commands.  “Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”  The only way to live out Deuteronomy 6:7 is by giving your children time talking together.

Motherhood is a huge time zapper! I see some moms bitter at their kids for the time they require – they snap at them and growl at them for being such a burden. God does not want us to resent our children for taking our time and they should never feel guilty for the sacrifices we make as moms. Let your complaints of motherhood remain between you and God and not you and your children and cling to Jesus and his example in John 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.”

Now go let’s go look our sweet peas in the eyes and be there for them.  If this is a struggle  - we need a perspective change.  Let’s View our children as gifts – say it out loud to them – “you are a gift“.  Watch them light up – they hunger for words of love and affirmation.  When we see them as gifts - we open ourselves to the joy that they bring us – like when your first child loses their first tooth! So exciting!
Walk with the King!


This post is linked to Raising Homemakers, Titus 2sdays, and We Are That Family.


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Join the fun, do a little blog hopping and don’t forget if you join below -please add the Women Living Well Wednesdays button to your post so your readers can find us here! (posts can include the topics of marriage, parenting, homemaking, finances, recipes, organization and more!)

Comments

  1. Emily @CreativeDisaster says:

    Thanks again and as always for setting me back on the right path!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Oh Courtney-you have no idea how much I needed to read this right now. I have felt like a slacker mom but don't know how to stop–I do schlep them from bible studies, co-op, play dates and have them go outside and don't spend very much quality time with them. And I have felt like they are a burden…and I know they aren't. It is my problem-my perspective that I need to work out with God. Thank you for your words tonight!

  3. Tara Cole says:

    This is so true, Courtney–great insight, as always!

    I like to say when people EXCLAIM when I'm out with my crew of four, "MY, you must be BUSY!"

    I always reply, "There isn't anything else in this season I'd rather be BUSY doing than raising these children. They are BLESSINGS." People tilt their heads, did she say, BLESSING and CHILDREN in the same sentance?! LOL! Yes, society sees it different than God (: Good thoughts!!

  4. The title of your post was perfect for me this week…we're in the middle of potty training! :) But, oh, can I actually say that I enjoy it??? :) As I write out my growth plan for the coming year (yes, we do it mid-year), I'll be coming back to re-read this post!

  5. Anonymous says:

    Courtney,
    Such a timely post for me! We are getting ready to move back stateside and take on homeschooling! I keep thinking how am I ever going to get the house cleaned and all the other things that need to be done and still spend quality time with my little ones! I agree that it is all a matter of perspective and I know once I changed my perspective parenting actually became a little bit easier :) Thank you for this post.
    Blessings,
    Sarah L.

  6. Homeschool on the Croft says:

    I think this is the biggest life-changer for a mum if she (even subconciously) sees her kids as a burden …. to begin seeing them as a gift and a blessing changes the way a mum does everything. Again, so well said…

  7. Far Above Rubies says:

    Great post, Courtney. Thank you.

  8. Thanks for this post – I needed it. I have a just-turned-3-yr old boy, an about-to-turn-2-yr old boy, & a baby girl due in June. My body has taken a pretty good blow w/ this pregnancy – I'm sore & tired & extremely busy right now. My #1 prayer has been that the Lord teach me balance & help me to not neglect my boys – their little lives go by in such a stinkin' hurry!!

  9. As a natural introvert who's not much of a talker, transitioning to motherhood has been a big challenge for me in certain areas, especially as my little one has moved out of the infant stage and into the walking and beginning to talk stage. He requires so much time and attention. I do notice that when I go beyond doing the minimum and shower him with attention, he lights up. It's so sweet. :)

    Thanks for this post, Courtney. Your kiddos are so cute, by the way.

  10. These comments about not just shepherding the kids from one place to another but really looking into their eyes and being there for them – really hit home for me. Thanks!

  11. Both of my sons swallowed a tooth. My youngest just cried and cried. But we had them write a note to the tooth fairy and all was well.

    Mothering is hard work and so tiring at times. But well worth the effort! Just last night I asked each of my kids before bed, to tell me five blessings. It could have been from that day or all time. Then I told them they were my blessing. My kids are my blessings from Heaven.

  12. Courtney, I am trying to put your "WLW Wednesday link up" image into my post on my site, but I am not sure how.
    Does anyone know how to do this using wordpress?
    When I copied and pasted the URL into the body, it came up as words and not an image.
    I AM NEW at all this fancy stuff. :)
    Sarah
    http://www.joyfilleddays.wordpress.com

  13. Treasures from a Shoebox says:

    Courtney, I accidentally added my post twice (thinking it didn't work the first time around). Could you remove one of them please (Spring Clean 2011 Kitchen)? Thanks!

  14. Flamingo says:

    sigh. I needed this. I love the idea of saying "you are a gift" every day to each of my kids. I wonder if it counts if you are screaming it? lol lol Just kidding. thank you for allowing God to speak once again.

  15. "Say it out loud. You are a gift!" Oh Courtney, could it be any simpler (or more important)? Thank you!!!
    Blessings,
    Toni

  16. Royalbird says:

    What you've written here is exactly why my husband and I decided that I should stay home with the kids, because they really need me here with my full attention. And though it can be a struggle, it's important to keep an eternal perspective because these children, these special souls, are more important than anything material in our lives.

  17. I've been stuggling so much in the area of motherhood recently. I have two girls 7 and 4 and two boys 3 and 7 mos. I stummbled upon your blog (PRAISE THE LORD) and your two posts this week have just nailed what I have been experiencing. I even had the nerve to question God "why did you pick me to be their mom?" I feel so guilty because I cannot find the time to be a hands on mom between homeschooling, taking care of their general needs, the home, my husband,and our ministry. I am very much challenged. I know that it's an issue that I need to bring to the Lord and ask Him for patience and understanding and to help me really see what my priorities are- raising my children to love and know Him! They will only be small once and now is the time to invest! Thank you for being a tool for Christ!

    Crystal

  18. Amy von Oven says:

    I am SO just not getting this right these days. I have got to let God help me get it all together, I know I can handle all the stress in my life, but only with Gods help. My family has got to come FIRST!!!!!

  19. Anonymous says:

    i like the pisher

  20. Jozana Carter says:

    Thank you so much for your post. This has a been a tough year of transitions and it was a good reminder of WHY I quit teaching to stay at home with my kiddos.

  21. Such a sweet and wise post. Thanks as ever, Courtney.

    Cxx

  22. Yes it is. But if you do it right – someday they'll want to come back home for visits and bring with them your precious grandchldren and in our case, two precious great-grandchildren. We will celebrate our 50th anniversary in July and I have absolutely no regrets about my marriage or my children and having served my Lord all these years., Can't wait to see what God has for us when we get old!!!!!!

  23. You are so right. Children should never be made to feel they are burdens, or unwanted. Yes, they annoy us, and yes, sometimes we have to demand (request?) our adult time. But they grow up way too fast and that chance to hug the five-year-old who brings you flowers or clap for the six-year-old ballerina is a fleeting gift. Trust me, I know. Mine are all in their 20s (great kids, btw) and I am sooo glad for my memories of their childhoods. It is a very, very precious time!
    PS–one of the easiest ways to spend quality time with your kids is to read to them! And not just kid books. Can you believe my two younger boys enjoyed "Jurassic Park" and "Watership Down" chapters before bed? (And Mom got to read adult books!)

  24. Anonymous says:

    I love your site. It always makes me feel good:)

  25. I never knew how selfish I really was until I had kids. Thanks for this great reminder, Courtney! I'm bookmarking this post so I can reread it every few months to help me keep a proper perspective. :o)

  26. Wow! Thank you so much for this post. You have no idea how much it hit home for me. I've been sick in bed for a few days with a bad sinus infection and my two year old has been driving me nuts…but it isn't HIM…its ME and my attitude. I really need to give that over to God and let him work on me. I just thank you so much for constantly being such an encourager, but also speaking the truth…you've opened my eyes to many things over the past several months since I've found your blog. Thank you :)

  27. heidi @ wonder woman wannabe says:

    One of my favorite articles that you've shared. Will be passing it along to my reader-friends.

    Cheers!
    ~h

  28. Courtney (Women Living Well) says:

    Sarah – I apologize I did not answer your question sooner – so here's your answer for next week if you choose to participate.

    Copy the code on my blop post. Go to your draft and click on the "html" tab. Paste the code in the draft. Save it and the button should appear on your final post.

    HOpe it works for you and thanks for trying to participate!
    Courtney

  29. Mrs. Zwieg says:

    Thank you very much for hosting this linky! Have a blessed day!

  30. Cecania Tallmadge says:

    It's a difficult career to be a parent. But we chose to be one and we should take responsibility with it. I'm glad that there are still parents that take more time to listen to their children's needs. A child needs more attention more that we could ever imagine and more than what we give when they first had their tooth or lose one. As a parent, we have to a lot huge of our time to them, so that they would not rebel and so that they would grow up as a good person and responsible parent too, when it is their time to give.

I love hearing what is on your heart.

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