Honey, the House Is On Fire!

  

While your husband is at work do you ever give him cause to worry about what is happening at home? Have you ever called him in the middle of the day with a big crisis for him to solve? Let me be honest, I strive not to and here’s why.

Proverbs 31:11 says, “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.”

My desire is to give my husband a wife who he can have full confidence in. I want him to be able to go to work and know that his wife is solid emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually to handle the home while he is gone. I want him to be able to rest in his wife’s steady support. BUT…

In June of 2010, my furnace fan caught fire while I was at aerobics class. When I returned home the house was filled with smoke and the alarms had failed to call the fire department!

My husband happened to be out of state on a business trip so rather than dialing 9-1-1 like I should have – I frantically dialed my husband’s cell! The poor guy was eating lunch with a group of business men (all from other states as well) – and here I am on the other end of the line – FRANTIC – FRAZZLED – FREAKED OUT!

He told me to do the obvious! Dial 9-1-1 and then call him back!

Luckily, our house was not burning down – though it appeared to be by the smoke! Our furnace fan had caught fire and as it burned it blew smoke through the entire house – then it went out inside the steel box. So I returned a call to my husband after the firemen arrived and fans were put into place to empty the house of smoke. I assured him all was well – and just a little stinky! Lol!

Oh how my pride hated having to call him in such distress! I so want to be capable – BUT this beast was more than I could conquer alone. God has given us our husbands to protect and provide for us and in this crisis I needed his leadership!

St. Joseph’s Beach, Michigan

Vice versa – our husbands need a woman who they can have full confidence in when they are not available. Proverbs 31:11 says he lacks nothing – absolutely nothing of value – if he has confidence in his wife. This means this character quality is of supreme importance.

Can your husband have confidence in you in these areas?

Money - Can he depend on you to spend it wisely?

Children - Can he trust you to train your children wisely?

Home - Can he trust you to run an orderly home?

Reputation - Can he trust you to not speak poorly of him behind his back?

Faithfulness - Can your husband trust you to not build emotional connections with other men?

Emotions - Can your husband trust you to be self-controlled when under pressure?

Choices - Can your husband trust you to make wise choices when urgent situations arise?

If not, what areas can you change in your own life so you can gain this character quality?   Commit these areas to prayer, search scriptures for guidance and find Titus 2 women who can help you grow as a wife.

Walk with the King!

Courtney

Comments

  1. says

    Such an awesome challenge, Courtney. I admit, I am not there. In fact, I dump on my husband waaay too often. :( I need to give it to God and let Him handle it. That’s not to say I cannot share later, when he’s home, if need be. But I’m willing to bet most issues will be resolved by then!

    Thanks Courtney for challenging me! Love ya!

  2. says

    GREAT post, Courtney! I definitely need to remember to this! I tend to call my husband too much while he is at work with my little “emergencies.” Poor guy- I need to remember that verse!
    I don’t comment hardly ever but I do read. I sat next to you at dinner once at Relevant last year….Sally Clarkson was at the table, too. :)

  3. says

    Great post and awesome reminders. Thanks Courtney! I did not know this happened to you!!! Ekk!!! I had to take Julia to emergency once-it just so happened to be the time Geoff was golfing at Firestone (no cells allowed). My mom called his mom who called his dad who called the club who sent a caddy out to tell Geoff we were at the hospital. I had it under control!!!!!!! lol! He came rushing to the hospital panicked. What are the odds. I felt so bad.

  4. Kelly says

    I rarely call my husband during the workday. We send texts back & forth during the day but nothing of any seriousness. I’m getting better with spending money. Over all, I’d say I’m pretty trustworthy ;)

  5. says

    You have been on my heart and in my prayers so much these last couple of weeks that I feel we’ve been having a dialogue. It all began with your interaction with the Scary Mama – since then I’ve ben praying God’s protection over you and God has reminded me time and again that persecution will come as we follow Him and share His love and truth with those around us. It’s not easy to be all in and live surrendered lives. Thank you for modeling peace, joy, and perseverance in the face of what many would consider suffering. And lastly I’ve had you on my mind as I’ve been reading through the 40 day RESPECT DARE. Thanks for suggesting the book. As a woman who submits rather naturally to her husband )by God’s Grace) I didn’t know what I’d find within the pages. Your post today echoed with some of the same strains I’m hearing as I study how God longs to grow me. The Holy Spirit is so faithful to speak to me and then to speak again through you.

  6. Renee says

    This was especially timely for me too. The two that hit a nerve for me were money and home. However, I seldom call hubby while he’s at work. It’s because I don’t have to . . . he’s always calling ME! Ha! Thanks for the gentle nudge that I needed. :)

  7. says

    such wise things to think on. what i find most difficult is the line between relating to other women about how to love and support our husbands but not straying into the area of talking badly behind his back…i know how important this is. what strikes me most often is how many women do disparage their husbands publicly – i never quite know how to respond to them!

  8. CDaigle says

    Well, i must say that when my husband leaves the house in the morning, his mind is pretty clear regarding finances, children, cleaning, cooking..anything and everything that involves our home. We have a strong marriage of 10yrs and he’s never had to worry about anything when he leaves his home. His lunches are always prepared for him and will sometimes leave him a sticky note saying,”you’re the best, I love you”, in his lunch like i do with the kids..hihi!! Marriage is suppose to be fun, not a job! I fall deeper in love with him each time he walks through our doors! With Jesus by my side he helps me to be a better wife and mother everymorning my feet touch the floor.

  9. says

    Your first few paragraphs made me chuckle because that’s exactly what the former Pastor’s wife of our church did when her house was on fire, she called her husband before the fire department : ) Had to make your men feel good though.

    Love the reminders at the bottom of the post, I’m hoping I’m doing okay in these areas hubby and I have a date tonight so it will give us something to talk about.

  10. says

    I am guilty of almost the same thing. Although mine involved a strange vehicle pulling in our driveway. I freaked out and called my husband and he told me the same thing your husband did, to call 911! Needless to say, it ended up being someone we knew :/
    Thanks for the reminders on being trustworthy. I have not been, at times, in the past but I am working to restore that trust.

  11. says

    Loved these reminders! I’ve learned that if there is something serious we need to discuss, to take care of it after he comes home. Sometimes, during lunch hours, but we try to reserve that for a “phone date” to catch up on our day and just talk about things going on in our life. :)

    As for emergencies…I always call him first, hee hee. I guess that is the natural chain of reaction for wives. :)

  12. Shaquan S. says

    Good morning Courtney & my deAr sistas in Christ :) I’m on the on my way to school & I am reading this mornings post from God sent thru you & I am so looking forward to becoming one with my fiance’ Damon we’ve been together for 12 yrs & we have 5 children but out the 5 one ppassed away but including my oldest 3 daughters before its a total of 8 children yupp a whoppin 8 children (7 girls & 1 boy). However we are well I am deciding a date for us to get married & I am so confused cause I’m thinking of our finances & I keep saying God will supply our needs & He will take care of the cost even our Apostle & his wife (Pastor) said they will help us & not to worry but the flesh will not allow to not worry. But what stuck out to me was the $ part LoL. I am not good with $ so I will pray on it & please pray for me

  13. says

    Wow! That is really something to chew on. I know there are a few of those areas I am not very strong in. Thank you for helping keep these things in front of me :)

  14. Jill Kaufman says

    Great post! Definitely what I needed to hear. It is week 3 of my husband’s 10-week business trip. We’ve never been apart for so long and I so badly want to whine when he calls. (I do get to go see him for a week to celebrate our 20-year wedding anniversary!)

  15. says

    My husband trusts my decision making capabilities when it comes to handling things at home. However, I know there are things on the list (building his trust in my ability to control emotions) that I need to work on. This post was a much needed reminder of that!

    My husband and I have deal that I will only call him at work if there is an emergency. So far, I haven’t had to do that. I did send several texts and emails a few weeks ago, though, to ask him to come home. A cat (not ours) had passed away in our yard. The dog needed to go out but I wasn’t sure what he (the dog) would do around the cat. I just couldn’t bring myself to deal with the cat myself so my husband came home to help. In the year that we’ve been married, that is only thing I have felt I needed his help with during the day (I have needed help other times – I’ve just waited until evening).

  16. says

    This was such a convicting post for me! I do not frequently call my husband, but I do call sometimes because I know it’s not a big deal. However, I have called at inopportune times before. This post really, really spoke to me. There are times when I think he would want to know what’s going on if it’s something out of the ordinary, but he probably doesn’t! He needs to be able to stay focused on his job knowing that his home & children are in capable hands. Wow. Never even considered applying the scripture from Proverbs in this area. Like I said, I don’t call him often, but I still really needed this eye-opener!

    ODDLY ENOUGH, I read this post last night & had to call him at work today because of a genuine issue! Your post & the verse from Proverbs just rolled in my mind so I did everything I could to avoid that phone call. Rats.

  17. says

    Great post! Thanks so much. I am working on this. The hardest for me is money but I’m working on being more faithful in this. I am so thankful for a husband who sees my efforts and loves me inspite of my shortcomings.

  18. Teresa says

    Wow – this could have been my post almost to the letter! My furnace caught fire in 2009. The gas check valve failed to close completely allowing the flame on the burner to continue burning (although at less force than normal). Since the flames were at the ignitor, it proceeded to burn the wiring, the labels etc that were on the front of the furnace. I turned off the emergency switch, but that only does the electric. The valve to the main gas line going into the furnace was frozen and even a pair of pliers wouldn’t do it. Burnt plastic smelling smoke was filling the house and my alarm failed to trigger. I called DH who was in NY at the time…my intent was to ask him where the main line turnoff was outside. I was very calm as I started to ask and he immediately told me to hang up and call 911! Well, I did and DS had a great time seeing the firefighters come to the house. No major damage. Had to be rewired…
    But DH still doesn’t let me live this down. Although he was proud that I was calm and thinking about the proper steps – he was a bit dismayed that I hadn’t first called 911 and then gone through the steps!

  19. says

    Hi,

    I’m sorry my english is not so good…. I’m Mirjam from the Netherlands ans I want to thank you for your beautifull and practifull website!!! You encourage me to love the homework I do! And this topic is verry good for me, because I call my husband too much at his work….. I’m going to try to call him lesser, only when it’s really nescesarry (? I wrote it wrong….)
    Thanks for your encouragement!!!

    Greets,

    Mirjam from the Netherlands

  20. says

    Wow! This spoke volumes to me. I am going to frame that Proverbs verse, for I have new revelation on what it means and next time I’m tempted to call my husband at work over a so-called “crisis”, I’m going to read that verse and then pray and ask God for the wisdom He has bestowed to me for nothing is TOO BIG for Him and I don’t need my husband to worry about “home”. He has enough to deal with on the battlefield away from the home… the home should be a haven for him when he comes home! Thank you for sharing this!!

  21. says

    A week and a half after I read this post, I found myself with a very small stove top kitchen fire. My husband works very close to our house and is on an Emergency team at work and I knew he’d know what to do. I thought of calling him, but first tried to put the fire out myself as I knew a fire could spread to your entire house in 5 minutes, so I had to act fast. The Lord brought to mind an article I had read recently that said to put a lid over a fire. That’s exactly what I did. As it began to go out, I called my husband. He offered to come home, which I thought was super sweet, but not necessary.

    It was truly a miracle that I noticed the fire when I did. I am notorious for multitasking while cooking (even though I know you are never supposed to leave the kitchen while cooking), but I just happened to be feeding my daughter lunch, with my back to the stove and turned around in time to see the fire before it was out of hand.

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