Revive Your Marriage – Week 4

 

We began the Revive our Marriage series with prayer, then we worked on our attitude. Last week we worked on our shoulder-to-shoulder friendship and now it’s time to show our husband’s our appreciation. 

 

Praise and respect are tied closely together.  It’s difficult to praise a man you are not respecting.

Ephesians 5:33 says “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself and the wife must respect her husband.”

This can be a difficult verse to apply because some women have husbands who are not doing the first half of this verse. Their husbands are not loving them as themselves BUT this blog is not written for men so we have to move on to the second part of this verse.

God’s command to wives is to respect our husbands – unconditionally. Our men are not boy scouts trying to earn badges of honor. God does not say – respect the husband who is “worthy” of respect. It is simply their position of ‘husband’ that we are to respect.

Dr. Emerson Eggerich says in his book “Love and Respect” that if you asked women if they’d rather their friends love or respect them – the majority would say love. But if you asked men if they’d rather their friends love or respect them – the men would answer respect. We are hard wired this way – God created men with the need to feel respected and adequate.

Think of what men will do for honor. They will take bullet shots from an enemy. While everyone is running out of a burning building, men will run up 20 flights of stairs to save lives. They will shoot the bear and laugh about it later. They are just wired this way – and isn’t it glorious that they are!

Sometimes we women “mock” the male “ego” – but it truly is tender. Deep down – there’s insecurity and they need to know that indeed they are adequate, they are enough, they are worthy of our respect.

“Women, as influencers, can breathe life into our men or kill them. Woe to us for quenching the life out of our men.” 

~ Mary Kassian 

Our men NEED encouragement!  We NEED our men.  We NEED our men to be Godly men! 

Our culture has beaten Godly men down.  They are going against the flow of the wordly system and take blows on every side.

Pop quiz:

1) List all the flaws of your husband.

2) List all the things that you admire about your husband.

Grade yourself: Which question was easier to answer?

There will be some women out there who find it easier to admire their husband than list his flaws. But I would venture to say that most of us find it easier to list their flaws. It’s a part of our sin nature!

So let’s break out of that mold – go against the grain of the world and praise our husbands!!!  Here’s our challenge:

 

**Chime In:  Share in the comment section what you admire about your husband!  Let your husband know what you wrote – he will walk taller.  :)

If you are a blogger- write your list - grab this button, then link-up below!
 

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Walk with the King,



Comments

  1. What do I admire about my husband? I admire him for being able to plan for the future, love and trust unconditonally, and say it how it is even if it is not easy. I have a hard time looking at finances in the future, I am a here and now girl. Somewhere I learned that people must earn my love and trust. Although I can be very blunt, I sometimes do not see the entire picture. I am so blessed to have him. He is truely my other half.

    • i admire my husband’s tender, kind heart. He is always there for people who can’t help themselves, and he cares for those who are weaker than he is. He is also athletic and sporty and likes to enjoy God’s creation. And he has a lovely voice.

  2. I admire many things about my husband. He is my leader and best friend whom I respect more than words could say. Mostly, I admire the fact that he is a Godly, faithful man. He is a man of his word and is respected by many. He has incredible wisdom as well as the ability to make me laugh so hard I cry. He is to me…amazing.

  3. Five things I admire about my husband:
    1-his unconditional love for me, I’m pretty hard to live with!
    2-his drive to provide for his family
    3-his ability to care for strangers who are at their most vulnerable
    4-his ever-present optimism
    5-his love for God and his family

  4. DougsWifeAmy says:

    It is true that criticizing my husband come all too easily. I need God’s help to view the good things and to build my husband up. I’m going to post 1 thing I admire about my husband each day on Twitter and use his “handle.”

  5. Lynda Duncan says:

    My husband is my best friend. I can talk to him about anything. I can also get his opinion and trust that it is the best or correct way. I know that God talks to me through him. He loves me unconditionally. He is always ready to do things that I want do, even if he may not want to do them as much as I do. He has a great sense of humor! He always backs me up when I make a decision. We have been married for 27 very fast and great years!

  6. Thanks for the challenge, Courtney! I linked up an older post. I think sometimes I need to go back to those moments before life got quite so crazy, busy, consumed with financial strain, etc…and just remember those moments of being madly in love with my husband!

  7. I only thought of 3 flaws, but on the admiration it was endless, I went to sleep thinking of all his great qualities. He is a much better person than I am and after 26 years of marriage I am really lucky to have him.

    I always thought marriage was like a poker game, some get dealt a good hand and some no matter how hard they try it just falls apart. I was crazy madly in love with him then and to this day I still get butterflies when he walks through the door.

    XOXO

  8. Love my husband’s voice! :) And many other things, but that was the first one that came to mind. :)

  9. This will be a good challenge to do but 1st that popped into my head is hard worker.

  10. Dawn Landgraf says:

    My husband is a compassionate listener, he is slow to anger and is very patient.

  11. 5 things I admire about my husband: 1.) His patience with me and my crazy antics 2.) That he is the same the day I met him as he is now (so many guys put on a nice front the few few weeks/months and then their “true” selves come out) 3.) Him going to work everyday at a job he does not like because he wants to provide for his family 4.) His many talents and blessings (artist, great cook, funny, handy, musician, can build or fix anything…) 5.) His kindness

  12. My husband is my best friend. I admire his loyalty (which is more precious than anything he could buy me), his wacky sense of humor, his intelligence, his math skills, his relationship with our kids, his love of God…and that is just the beginning of the list! I am still madly in love with him!

  13. My husband works so hard at our marriage, it’s impossible not to respect him for that! He’s a firefighter so he does risk his life to save others and help them in their pain and fear and I admire him for doing that as a volunteer. He loves our boys and spends time with them one on one, helps them with life questions and vehicle questions. I have seen him lay his life down for us more and more over the years as he gives up his “rights” over and over to serve and love his family. He has much wisdom to guide and help us make better decisions in big and small things. He is my best friend and I am so thankful to God for him!

  14. Five of the many things I admire about my husband are:

    1. His love for me
    2. His love and dedication towards our family
    3. The strong desire he has to provide for our family
    4. His desire to mentor
    5. He knows how to fix most anything related to technology

  15. When I was going through post partum depression I started taking a picture everyday of my husband doing something I loved about him. I would write A simple sentence or two saying why I love him. In the fog of my depression it was easy to focus on the little negatives but instead I committed myself to find one different thing each day to love about my sweet husband. I did this for a year and have about 10 days left.

  16. I admire my husband so much, although I fall short with reminding him. This is a great reminder of how I need to tell him more often. He is truly a ‘ man after God’s own heart’, striving everyday to walk closer with the Lord. But filled with humility, he never wants to take credit for anything. He is extremely patient with me and the kids, and we have 5 of them with the oldest 6 and youngest 0. He loves to have fun. Even on those days that are hectic with responsibilty, he can lighten the situation and have a good time. He makes his family a priority- over the lawn, fixing the cars, etc. he’ll stop and play with the kid. He prays and talks with others about God. I think my list is getting longer than 5, I guess I admire him more than I thought. I think I’ll go let him know right now :)

  17. GREAT POST!!! Needed it! Thanks!

  18. Courtney, I am loving this series! I have been writing your challenges down on a notecard. My niece is getting married soon and I would love to pass these on to her. Any suggestions?

  19. I admire my husband so much. He is the man of my dreams and a man who seeks God daily. He works so hard for our family and so that I can stay at home with our children. Although, I fall short of making sure he knows how much I admire him and love him, I truly do and know that I need to do better about letting him know that I do. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I always love seeing whats next.

  20. Karen Souder says:

    I admire my husband because
    1. He loves the Lord with all His heart
    2. Witnesses to everyone he meets.
    3. Travels the world to be missional (doesn’t just talk a out it)
    4. Is past retirement age but has a 10 year Plan to finish what
    God has called us to do.
    5. Loves me unconditionally after 40 years!

  21. Things I admire and appreciate about my husband:

    1. He loves Jesus!
    2. He loves me! even when I test him!!
    3. He is a fantastic father to our 5 sons!
    4. He is a very hard worker and a good provider.
    5. He is a fantastic narcotics investigator who is well-respected by other officers, prosecutors, judges, and defense attorney; and has probably arrested more “bad guys” than any other police officer in our state!

    I think that Jesus must be trying to accomplish something in me or maybe someone else…. I just posted a very similar post on my blog last evening! :)

  22. 1. He is a believer and desires his family to serve God
    2. Unbelievable patience when I am busy with a hectic schedule
    3. Will help my parents at any time
    4. Loves his children
    5. Hard worker
    6. Sense of humor
    7. Willing to go the extra mile for people (and me)

  23. Agreed with All, got some new points.

I love hearing what is on your heart.

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