5 Ways to Worry Less About Your Husband’s Safety

Some of us have husbands with very dangerous jobs like roofers, police officers, firemen, military men, loggers, fishermen, construction workers, electricians, steel workers, miners, ranchers, truckers, pilots and more.

Some of us have husbands with dangerous hobbies like skydiving, mountain climbing, white water rafting, biking, hunting, full contact sports, wood carving and more.

And let’s be honest, while our men are out slaying their dragons, our minds can wander to that place –that place where we imagine the worst case scenario.

Over the years, my husband has taken up many jobs and hobbies that have given me reasonable cause for worry.

One sport he loved back when the kids were very small was Mixed Martial Arts (MMA).  After some injuries, a broken nose (as seen in the above photo –somebody missed a block from a black belt) and surgery he shelved that sport (thank goodness).  But it sure did give me a lot of reasons to wring my hands in worry.

Another hobby he enjoyed since the day I met him was flying.  His father was a pilot and he flew with him a lot –so he got his license at age 17.  When I met him –he was already flying. The job of a pilot is ranked 3rd most dangerous in the list of most dangerous jobs of 2012 on multiple websites. My husband is not a commercial pilot but he flies for business.  When the sky looks cloudy, windy, stormy, and snowy –my heart skips a beat and I say a silent prayer, “Lord, please protect Keith.”  Sometimes he takes our son as his co-pilot, and I worry.  How could I ever go foward in life if I lost my boys? I just couldn’t…

Then there’s truck driving that he does for His business from time to time.  Just last week he drove a truck 400 miles in icy, east coast conditions and I prayed –actually we prayed. My kids are quite the little prayer warriors for Daddy.

The photo below shows my son sitting on an oversized truck that daddy had just driven home, hundreds of miles through a large city.

How do I handle all this worry and anxiety?

1. Pray. Pray. Pray. 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6,7 NIV

As I said above, we pray a ton for Daddy.  When I feel anxious –I hand it over to God.  This was not a burden I was meant to carry, it’s just too much to bear somedays.  I have to pray to find peace.  And God is faithful and he always delivers peace just in time. 

2.  Trust.

“When I am afraid, I will trust in you.” Psalm 56:3NIV

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.” Isaiah 26:3

After praying, I have to choose to trust God.  I know that He is sovereign and in control of all things. If this is the appointed time for death or a trial in our lives –nothing we do, can thwart that.  God is in control and will see us through the good and bad times.  I can rest in knowing that my husband is in great, mighty, and loving hands.

3. Listen to praise and worship music.

“Glorify the LORD with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:3,4

I can’t worry and sing praises at the same time.  Singing and setting my mind on God takes my eyes off of what I’m worrying about and sets my heart free to have peace.  I have found much peace of mind through soft worship music playing in my house.

4. Know God’s Word.

“I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” Psalm 119:11

Worry is a sin :( because it means that we are not trusting God.  When I am in God’s word, meditating and memorizing –I have the tools to combat worry.  Knowing God’s word is key to overcoming our fears and anxiety. 

5.Use it to bless others

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
2 Corinthians 1:3,4 NIV

God wants to use our trials to bless others.  After he comforts us, he wants us to serve others by comforting them.  Serving for me has been a huge outlet that has turned my trial into a joy. 

*Give thanks.

 “Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.” Psalm 107:1

Everytime my husband returns safely – I give thanks.  God continues to answer our prayers and I am so grateful that he does. 

There are no guarantees in life.  Just as I worry about my husband –there are many other causes for worry in life.  I have found that the above list helps me in the face of all my trials.  It’s a daily discipline of praying, trusting, worshiping, and being in God’s word that brings us through our trials with joy and peace.

 **Chime In: What are you worried about today and how has God helped you find peace in the midst of your fears?

Walk with the King,

 

 

 

Comments

  1. says

    This post came at the perfect time! My husband leaves for a weeklong business trip tomorrow. He doesn’t go often and my daughter is really upset that he’s going to be away. I’ll share this with her.

  2. Anna says

    My husband is in the military. We’ve been through 2 year long deployments and right now he is on a year long assignment in Korea. I worry about him constantly. A year is a very long time to hold that kind of emotion and having God on my side, makes thing so much easier. I wouldn’t be able to get through one singly day if it weren’t for my morning coffee with Jesus. Thank you for this.

  3. says

    This is my greatest worry Courtney! You nailed it for me. Walking with Jesus has taught me how to TRUST. Its so hard, yet so easy to do…Love ya, Nelle P.S- love that photo of Keith hehe! What a good sport!!!

  4. Kris S says

    Awesome!!! Thank you so much! Being able to trust God with our husbands (and children, for that matter) and truly lay them at His feet is huge! It’s making the statement that we’re relinquishing control and stepping back. Thanks for sharing some great ways that we can practically do that and work through that process.

  5. Ashley says

    Thank you Courtney! This is just what I needed. Not just for my husband, but b/c I worry about EVERYTHING. I worry b/c I don’t make enough $ at my job to help w/ enough bills, I worry about what all of my husband’s family is thinking of me (I feel judged), I worry about health, the future, etc. So I am going to take your tips and apply them to ALL my worries! :)

  6. Lorrie Runion says

    God has not given us a spirit of fear. My husband leads where his heart directs, as God has designed him. It is an honor to be part of his journey either to work as a police officer or to serve in the military. Praying and praising truly do work to get me through the sometimes long days. Being busy about what God designed me for also helps my mental state. The Proverbs 31 woman was busy and there was no dishonor in it. Thanks for spreading the very good tips.

    • Natalie says

      Thank you so much for your words Lorrie! I’m walking through something difficult at present and your comment has really blessed and released me from a lot of fear and worry this morning..Thank you so very much.

  7. Ronnie says

    Prayer has kept me from loosing it! I prayed for safety for my family, but when the school misplaced my 5 year old (that’s a story) I knew that I couldn’t watch him 24/7. I had to lean on God for the family. He’s 20 now in college, and when I don’t hear from him as often as I would like, I remind myself of who is with him. I normally send him scriptures that I am praying for him by text. Keeps me grounded.

  8. Becky says

    Thank you for sharing this! Prayer, choosing to trust God with my worries, and memorizing Scripture have been the things God has taught me to do through the almost 8 years I’ve been married to my firefighting husband. :) His job terrified me at first to the point that I would count down the hours until his shift was over, fearing any moment I would get a phone call that he had been injured or worse on the job. He has had a few close calls over the years but watching God protect him through it all has strengthened my faith in knowing that God has a plan for my husband’s life, and He will not allow anything to happen that is not a part of His perfect plan. I can’t imagine my life without my husband but as much as I love him God loves him infinitely more and will ALWAYS hold him in His hands. I’m still learning how to trust God completely in this area but the points you shared are so true. Thanks for the reminder.

  9. says

    It is AMAZING how you are posting these special husband posts right when I need them!

    My husband is a TRAVELING welder (your traveling husband posts are helping me in major ways!) who works in oil & gas refineries. For unknown reasons over the past few days my mind has been going to that dark place of fear – “what if the refinery/plant blows up killing everyone, including my husband?”

    I just recently have begun purposing to rely on God fully – FOR EVERYTHING – so it’s definitely taking some time to really understand what giving everything to Him really means. :)

  10. Amy says

    My husband is in the army (we have been together 12 of his 15.5 years) and I worry every time he has to spend the day doing anything dangerous. When he deployed the last time I went through the book The Power Of A Praying Wife by Stormie O’Martin, I selected a number of Scriptures covering the areas that I felt like need the most prayer. Using Biblegateway.com (I cheated, I wanted it to be a surprise so hand writing out the verses would have given it away) I did a copy/paste and printed out the verses for him to carry in his wallet or pocket. I also made him a comforter for his bed and then took a permanent marker and wrote the Scripture references on the hems of the comforter. As I did all this I prayed each Scripture over the paper and bedding. Now he had the Scriptures like it says in the Psalms “In my coming and going. and in waking and sleeping”. I was still worried but I wasn’t swamped with fear.

  11. Adele says

    I think this is one of the things us wives worry about the most. It was for me, until just over 2 years ago, when my husband was dying right beside me. With God’s grace I did CPR on him and by medical accounts it was a miracle the paramedics got a heartbeat. He is fine today – but that day God showed me, the only Permanant, non changing, only Person I need and can trust is our Lord Jesus Christ. That was so freeing, because I always thought what will happen if my husband dies – he did not, but in those hours and days after the event, I was given strenght I did not know I had, peace I cannot explain.
    My son asked me, what would have happened if he died – I told him, God knew, before forming the earth, when we will be born and when we will die, and He will alway be there for us, He promised. It would obvouisly not be so nice having Daddy around, but we can trust God, He has special plans for all of us and He is in control – This is so freeing to know. Thank you for all your honest posts Courney!

  12. says

    Dearest Courtney, when your latest post popped up in my inbox today, I could hardly believe my eyes!!! My husband is travelling to the U.S. on Wednesday (we are Israelis living in New Zealand… I know.. Long story :-)) and he’ll be gone for over 3 weeks, while I stay home with our four little treasures.

    Well, I had just been out crying my little heart out to the Lord telling Him how worried and scared I was that my hubby wouldn’t return home to me. I told God that if I didn’t have that worry in my life at the moment, about 85% of all the stress surrounding this trip would instantly dissipate!

    Came back home… Open email, enter Women Living Well’s blog post of the day!!!

    WOW!

    Thank you thank you thank you… I know that you didn’t realise that when you wrote this blog it would be for the sole purpose of reaching MOI, but there you have it! It was!

    I am so grateful to God for His words through you, and also for all the wonderful ministry you have to us ladies. God bless you my dear, beloved sister!

  13. Amy Talbott says

    Thank you for this post. I do struggle with worry. I am a Respiratory Therapist and I have worked in the hospital setting for 18 years now. I have seen a Lot of really scathe things over the years. My husband of soon to be 6 years works in construction. I have taken care of many a patient following accidents on the job.site. I know first hand what can happen. I also have a terribly vivid imagination. (I usually don’t watch movies anymore because it gets my mind so torqued up.)
    I too must practice these principles on a regular basis. Thank you for the reminders. And also the importance of realizing that following and trusting our Lord is Always the.safest place to be even when it brings pain and sorrow.
    I am close to having our 5th child. The oldest of our children turned 5 this past January. I often find myself fearful that something will happen to my sweet husband and I will be left to manage all this myself. Oddly enough I know I could financially support us, but the issue of the.child care and education and such is the scathe aspect. Yet again I shouldn’t dwell on what it’s, instead trust my Savior day by day. Truthfully my imagination aid Always Much worse than reality.
    Thanks again for your ministry, your encouragement, and your faithfulness.
    God Bless
    Amy

  14. says

    my husband is a smoker, so I have worried about that for 37 years! he has quit a couple times, but always goes back. I believe addictions are spiritual issues, so I know only God can change his heart and heal him. The scriptures above have helped me over the years.

  15. Michelle says

    Being married to a military pilot, this has become my area of expertise. My husband was gone an average of 200 days a year, for the last three years. I was wondering if you were going to touch on the pornography issue at all, as it seems unfortunately sometimes it can go hand in hand with a traveling husband. God is just healing our marriage of this, and I am so grateful. He is so good. I just wish there was some way I could have clued in earlier.

    Thank you for your heart, it shines brightly through your writing, and encourages me in Jesus. I love that. Thank you for being a light.

  16. Alicia says

    After being married for 15 years, my husband is now set on getting a motorcycle and has never ridden one. Mid-life crisis or a life long dream? We just got back together after a painful separation and I feel I overcame what had taken place. I finally have a husband that I dreamed of. Now I have images in my head that he will die on the freeway… my little boy is having anxiety and fear about it also. I know it’s my fault. I have caught myself worrying and it creates tension in our marriage. I needed this so badly! THANK YOU, THANK YOU!

    • Esther says

      Hi Alicia, I’m getting married in 30 days and my husband-to-be is a huge motorbike fan. He’s had a motorbike for years, first it started with the 250, then the 600, now he has an 1100. I worry every time he rides, especially as I live with my mum and dad out in the country in Australia and there are kangaroos and wombats trying to cause accidents all the time. I pray that he never gets hurt especially as all boys love to ride FAST of course. I’ve really had to learn to let God handle it which is really hard–I keep thinking, what if something happens just before our wedding or in our early days as newlyweds! I dread getting a phone call saying he’s had an accident. What comforts me (and I don’t know if this is great theology!) is that if I really believe God wants us together, He wants us together for a reason and that purpose of His can’t be worked out if my boy isn’t around anymore! So I trust that God will keep Him safe for as long as He wants him here with me, as long as he isn’t taking foolish risks. So if you believe that God has brought you and your husband back together, it’s for a reason! Keep praying for His safety and God will honor that and answer your prayers!! The other thing you can do if you’re game is what I do–jump on the back of the bike and see how much it changes the way they drive when they have their ‘most precious cargo’ on the back. It really opened my fiancee’s eyes as to how dangerous riding can be when he literally had my life in his hands. He said he wouldn’t forgive himself if his riding caused me to be hurt and I was able to tell him how I worry the same thing about HIS riding hurting HIM. Now I love riding on the bike and it’s been a real bonding thing for us. I even went and got my bike license :) Like Courtney said in one of her YouTube videos, if your man is into something, be into it too! It’ll bring you closer together and make him feel great!! God bless you.

  17. says

    My Rooster works in the gas/oil business. He has done this work since he was 15 years old. He has capped fires, laid under a truck while piping was blowing out of the ground, etc. He has also been a volunteer fireman/EMT, and was in the Marine Corp. He thrives on this type of work.

    He lost an eye in a drilling accident. But this hasn’t stopped him.

    This is a part of my Rooster that I have to accept and know that God is with us in all things. I pray for him all the time. He makes sure to call me in the evenings just to calm some of my fears. I know that God is in control.

    I also listen to Christian music when I need extra help.

  18. Kim S. says

    Five years ago., my husband fell 14 feet, crushing his elbow and some bones in the top
    of his foot. How I have praised God that not only did he survive, he had relatively “minor”
    injuries. He did face surgery and a long recovery with therapy. Our 4 children ranged in age from 11years to 4 months at the time. I remember pushing the baby stroller and Mark’s wheelchair at
    the same time, one hand on each. I had my “why us Lord” days; but I also drew closer to Him.
    I could feel His presence so strongly. Truly God was in the details. Being a Christian doesn’t mean
    a free pass on hurts, trials, and tribulations. But praise God, we have SOMEONE who will nevr
    leave nor foresake us. When we trust Him even in the darkest moments, our anchor holds!

  19. Pat says

    Courtney, God has blessed you with a lot of wisdom for your age. My husband was a pilot and skydiver when I met him. He continues to do think things that lead a wife to worry. I have learned to turn it over to the Lord in prayer but it took me many more years to get to that point than it did you. Bless you for the love and wisdom that comes through you from God to your readers.

    I cried when I read your blog on the “haters”. Some people just have a lot of anger festering in them and it erupts on those around them. It is sad and lonely world without God in it. Keep on doing what you do. You are a blessing to God, your family, friends and the readers blessed enough to find you.

  20. says

    When I was a little girl both my mom and dad were police officers. By the time I became a teenager they weren’t, but my brother and his wife were, and my uncle and my cousin were. Because I was raised in that environment, I just never really thought about the danger. It just seemed like a job like any other. Until the night my brother was involved in a shoot out. My sis-in-law heard it over the scanner and called us. That night the danger became real to me.

    Right now both my boys are driving. You can bet that I have had some anxious moments when they are out driving on the road. But I have learned (am continuing to learn) to pray, remind myself of Scripture and God’s faithfulness, and just continue to leave it in the Lord’s hands. Sometimes I take it out and have to remember to put it back again though, lol! It’s also a process of training our minds on what to think about (Phil. 4:8) and taking our thoughts captive for Christ (II Cor. 10:5).

  21. says

    Thank you for this encouraging word! I am a worrier. Anxiety and fear are big battles in my life. Tonight, as my husband is going to a “bad” part of town to minister to men at a shelter I can become prone to worrying about his safety. Thank you for this timely reminder to put my trust in the Lord, and for the encouragement of other things to set my mind on. Thank you! :)

  22. says

    My husband works in a prison as a correctional officer, and last week he was trying to break up a fight between an inmate and another officer when that inmate started beating my husband. He came home looking really torn up, and it has really had me shaken. (My dad was also a correctional officer and was brutally beaten in the head during a riot) …I have always done my best to cloak my husband in prayers every day when he goes to work, but I still get so scared for his safety
    I am so glad I came across this article, it’s such a blessing! I especially like your tip: I can’t worship and worry at the same time! Thank you so much for posting, this came at just the right time for me and our family!!

  23. Sara Beth says

    My husband is a lineman. I worry about him working with huge electrical currents in the middle of awful lightning storms. :( However, God rocked me in a Baptist cradle… I grew up never worrying about storms… Maybe God was preparing me to be married to my wonderful husband and the risks he takes for so many people. :’) Now you’ve got me crying tears of appreciation! :) Thanks for the post… It was a good read… And thanks to my sis (biological and spiritual) for forwarding it to me… Love her!

  24. Heidi Cook says

    Hi Courtney,
    I love your posts and I am not married. This one really hit home. I am the caretaker for my dad who is dying of cancer. We are entering the final part of his journey home to be with the Lord. I have started worrying when I don’t hear his noisy breathing. I worry that I will go in and find him dead. I know he is ready to go. It is just the thought of finding his body. I will continue to talk with Father about peace and would greatly appreciate prayers.
    Thanks again for the timely reminder.

  25. Katie says

    Wow… Talk about a God-moment! I found this post by clicking through several different blogs that were somehow connected to one that I’m a member of. And I know it was God speaking. My husband is deathly allergic to beestings and as spring approaches, the worry about bees and his safety has been in the forefront of my mind for a couple of days. I have been praying and trying to hand over my fears to God because I know that Kevin is His anyway and not really mine, but this was like a wake-up call from God reminding me that I can choose to trust Him with my most precious husband and that He DOES answer my prayers. I’m sure that you all have lots of things going on in your own lives, but if you think of it, joing me in praying for my husband’s safety and also open doors as we look for a job that will have lower chances of coming into contact with bees. Thank you for your ministry!

  26. says

    Thanks for sharing! When I was a newlywed, my husband worked late nights, and we lived in a bad neighborhood. I was always afraid of what would happen if my husband didn’t come home, or worse… if someone was lying in wait for him when he arrived home (as that happened twice and he nearly got shot). My fear was paralyzing. We moved up the hill and I thought I had gotten over the fear, but 6 months later my husband was doing day labor in a shady part of town and again those fears cropped back up. Then he got a job working nights and I freaked out once again. I finally gave my husband over to the Lord, sobbing my heart out one night, and it was incredibly healing. My fear was so dehabilitating. I had believed the lies from the Devil that I couldn’t do anything about it and I had to live with it – but in reality, all I had to do was pray, pray, pray, cry out to God, and trust Him to take care of my husband (and me if something happened to him).

    Shortly after I gave everything over to the Lord, God blessed my husband with a day job with higher pay. I know that God was working all along, but part of me feels like my fear was holding my husband back from greatness (as my fear was spilling over into our marriage and hurting our intimacy), and me from living a life free from fear.

    I’m not worry-free, but I worry WAY less, and I have Bible verses handy for when I struggle with fear. These are great tips! I especially love the suggestion of listening to praise and worship music. Music always has a way of calming me down and listening to Scripturally-sound music that speaks about God’s never-changing, faithful character would minister to my heart greatly. I’m going to keep that in mind for the next time I feel fear cropping up again.

  27. Kami says

    I read this post casually last night, not particularly worried about my husband at the time but knowing I do worry more than I should.

    Then, I woke up this morning and got a positive home pregnancy test! I had to come back and find this post because I need it. My previous three pregnancies have ended in early miscarriage, and I’m tired of worrying. Regardless of the number of this little one’s days, I know I can trust God.

    So, thank you for sharing this. <3

  28. Zahra says

    Hi Courtney,

    It amazes me how I found this page! I was not aware that I am not alone! Thank you so much for posting this wonderful article to help us wives out there with similar situations. My husband just started traveling to the other side of the world and I haven’t heard from him all day. What you wrote has really brought peace to my heart. You have given us all wonderful reminders to keep our relationship with God as strong as can be. I hope to incorporate it into my life everyday because like you said there is a lot we can worry about. May God Bless you and your family. Thank you also to all those who took the time to respond! :)

    Your sister,
    Zahra

  29. Amanda says

    My youngest son has severe food allergies and is going into first grade this year. I was so anxious about sending him to school in the first place that I worked 3 days a week in his classroom. One day, when I wasn’t there, he had been given a cookie that could have potentially been harmful to him. It was an honest mistake between the teacher and a helper. I rushed over to the school and found him sitting at the office staff’s desk with a big smile on his face. The first thing he said to me was, ” Mom, I ate a cookie that might have had nuts and I’m okay, God protected me.” Now, as I face that same fear as he goes in for a longer day and will be eating lunch at school I have to remember to give this fear to God. There has been many times he has whispered to me, “He’s mine and I will protect him.” I have to remember as much as I love my children, God loves them even bigger than I could and he keeps his children safe here on earth and even when they’re not here anymore.

  30. says

    My fiancée works in the oilfield. In alberta。 Just this summer, our area has been ravaged with forest fires. There’s also the constant risk of toxic gas – I’m reminded painfully of it every time he shaves to be able to wear the gas mask. It’s so hard not to worry! I feel I have one more tip that has helped me is to talk about it! In my city, there’s no point going thru this alone. Thousands of other women face the same fears so that their husbands may work to bring in the oil we use every single day. God bless blue collar men!

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