Marriage Challenge 2

What a Majority of Men Want For Valentine’s Day and a Giveaway

February 9, 2011 By Courtney 140 Comments

Photo credit Boston Herald

This Monday is Valentine’s Day. In a lot of marriages, this day comes and goes without a whole lot of acknowledgement. We women see it on the calendar – we know it’s there, we’ve helped our children write out all their little Valentine’s Day cards…and we cross our fingers that our husband NOTICES it is Valentine’s Day.

If you are a lucky one – you will get a card, flowers, dinner out, maybe some chocolates and some romance. And well – the rest of us…it might not happen and we’ll just have an annoying day lol!

But rather than waiting around for something that might not happen – how about we use this day to show our husbands appreciation for the blessing that they are in our lives. This day gives us a reason to shower our husbands with some extra Tender Loving Care!!!

Remember – there are no exceptions in the Bible where it says on Birthdays, Mother’s Day and Valentine’s Day we have permission to get selfish and self-centered.

Philippians 2:3,4 says “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”

My husband is thoughtful. It is not uncommon for him to show up with my favorite drink from Starbucks, a late night run to fill my car up with gas, or a timely back rub. But he’s not Mr. Romance. I am 100% secure in his love for me by the way he works so hard to provide, listens to my long detailed stories lol!, protects me and the children and does a whole slew of other things 365 days a year! I don’t want to despise him on February 14th for not coming up with a soap opera type romantic extravaganza. I know it’s not gonna happen and it probably won’t happen for about 90% of us!

So why not have some fun planning something special for our husbands and making a memory! Do you know what your husband wants? There’s still quite a few days left – so ask him!

Let me make a suggestion as to what a majority of men want even if they aren’t willing to say it:

1. A great tasting, looking, smelling home cooked meal and home cooked dessert (I plan to make an all red dinner – red drink – red spaghetti – red dessert)

2. You pursuing him for a night of passion (remember you are married – HAVE fun! God created passion for us married folk! lol!) Don’t be afraid to flirt again – wink at him across the table – suggest what is for dessert after the kids are in bed *wink*. Loosen’ up and have fun! Make a memory that neither of you will forget!

3. Write a letter expressing all the things you admire about him. Consider reading it out loud to him at dinner in front of your children. Or if you are going out to dinner – put your list in your purse and then pull it out in the middle of dinner and read it to him. Trust me – he will LOVE it!

Which of the three does your husband need from you right now?

*****I am excited to share that I have a giveaway today!!! It’s the “Love and Respect For a Lifetime” hardback Gift Edition!!! This is a GREAT book to read together with your husband (if he is willing). My husband and I have led his marriage study in our home and it has been a huge inspiration in our own marriage.

Dr. Emerson Eggerich says:
“When you touch your husband’s deepest need something good almost always happens!”

To enter to win just leave a comment below before Monday, February 14th!

I want to invite bloggers to link-up if you are participating in this challenge. If you are not a blogger – please leave a comment below to let me know that you have committed to the challenge!

Join the fun, do a little blog hopping and don’t forget if you join below -please add the Women Living Well Wednesdays button or the Marriage Challenge button to your post so your readers can find us here! (posts can include the topics of marriage, parenting and homemaking)

Walk with the King!

I am linked up at Titus2days (Time Warp Wife), Raising Homemakers, and Works for Me Wednesday.

Filed Under: Giveaways, Marriage, Marriage Challenge 2, Women Living Well Wednesdays

I’ll Try To Keep This G-Rated!

February 2, 2011 By Courtney 41 Comments

“The more womanly you are, the more manly your husband will want to be.” Elizabeth Elliot

There is something about the sparkle in our eye, the smile that says I adore you, the curves of our body, the sweet smell of our perfume, the way we move in the dark…that draws a man to a woman.

Proverbs 30:18,19 says“There are three things that are too amazing for me, four that I do not understand; the way of an eagle in the sky, the way of a snake on a rock, the way of a ship on the high seas, and the way of a man with a maiden.”

For men the physical need for intimacy is more than just physical – it is emotional. Just as we long to remain desirable to our husband’s, our husband’s long to know that they are still desirable to us. Their big ol’ egos might not let them admit it – but it’s there.

Within our God given femininity, we have the power to make our men feel stronger, more capable, more confident and loved in all areas – simply by responding to his initiatives with desire.

So this week’s challenge is:

Pursue intimacy and place the intimate needs of your spouse above your own. Give him a foot or back massage, shower together, be creative!

Seek to “kiss him like you mean it” every single day this week! Solomon 5:16 says “His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely.” Look at your husband through the eyes of his fiance…do you remember those butterflies and your longing for him. Renew that passion.

Paula Rinehart says that for many men, “S*x is like a silent cheer.”

Our men feel stronger, more capable, and built up when we respond to their advances with a smile.

“Be available, agreeable and interested.(~Linda Dillow, Intimate Issues)

“When you touch your husband’s deepest need something good almost always happens!”~ Dr. Emerson Eggerich

So I challenge you today to not just show your husband you love him but show him that you LIKE him!

I want to invite bloggers to link-up if you are participating in this challenge (if you are not joining the challenge but have an encouraging post on marriage, parenting or homemaking feel free to join the link-up fun!). If you are not a blogger – please leave a comment below to let me know that you have committed to the challenge!

Walk with the King!

I am linked up at Titus2days, Raising Homemakers, and Works for Me Wednesday.

Filed Under: Marriage Challenge 2

You Go First – 10 Fun Ways to Praise Your Husband

January 26, 2011 By Courtney 30 Comments

I remember being in a fight with my husband and knowing he was wrong and I was absolutely right. There was NO way I was going to apologize for anything I had said or done and I was not about to be the first one to try to make amends. This huge fight was his fault and he was going to have to come to me and make it right.

I dug my heels in sure that any minute he would come up the stairs and beg me for forgiveness…and I waited…waited in anguish – crying – praying…praying…praying…uh oh I sense God telling me to give him grace. Uh oh – thoughts of forgiveness and mercy ran through my mind.

“No way God! Not this time! No quick easy forgiveness from me – no mercy!”

…a flood began surging in my soul…I knew that I could not suppress the truths of God’s word…and so I got up slowly and put one foot in front of the other…I went down one step and then the next slowly…and I went first…and apologized. And as I went first – the flood gates of communication opened up free and clear – a civil conversation appeared out of no where and the road to reconciliation began.

Going first. It’s not easy to go first…it takes great strength and humility to go first. I’ve been called a doormat on many occasions on-line for my beliefs about marriage…a doormat sounds weak…I am not weak.

It’s easy to scream, yell, and fight. No one has to teach me how to do that! lol! The harder thing is to bite my tongue and choose to not fight. That takes strength. The weak are those who hold a grudge, remain in their bitterness, refuse to forgive – the strong are secure in their faith knowing that they are loved with the unfailing love of Jesus. The strong can give what Jesus gave – forgiveness, mercy and grace.

And so no matter how poorly week 1 went with the 25 Day Praise Plan - I invite you to be strong and join me for week 2 of the Be My Valentine Marriage Challenge!

This week’s challenge is: be a little more creative with your praise. Surprise your husband with these 10 fun ways to praise your husband:

1. A love message on the mirror

2. A love message packed in his lunch

3. Use sidewalk chalk and write a love message on the driveway

4. Write a list of ten things you admire about him and then read them out loud to him.

5. Make a toast to him at dinner with friends. Or raise your glass at dinner and list the things you admire about your husband for your children to hear!

6. Buy or make your husband a trophy and engrave it with the words “The Best Husband in the World.” (I found a cheap trophy at a party supplies store – the kids loved presenting it to daddy)

7. Write a poem – even if you can’t write – it can be goofy. Include in it references to your favorite movies, restaurants, places to go and memories. He will enjoy the trip down memory lane and the laugh!

8- Blow up balloons and put a loving message in each one. Fill your bedroom with balloons as a surprise.

9- Take a roll of receipt tape and write a long message with the things you admire and respect about your husband – then roll it up and put it in a bottle for your husband to open and read. (I made many of these for my husband in college when we were dating long distance. I mailed them in packages.)

10. Get creative with your selflessness!

“When you touch your husband’s deepest need something good almost always happens!”~ Dr. Emerson Eggerich

So I challenge you today to not just show your husband you love him but show him that you LIKE him!

I want to invite bloggers to link-up if you are participating in this challenge. If you are not a blogger – please leave a comment below to let me know that you have committed to the challenge!

Walk with the King!

I am linked up at Titus2days, Raising Homemakers, and Works for Me Wednesday.

Filed Under: Marriage Challenge 2, Women Living Well Wednesdays

The 25 Day Praise Plan – Marriage Challenge

January 19, 2011 By Courtney 63 Comments

There are 25 days until Valentine’s Day so it’s time to implement the 25 Day Praise Plan.

Each week the challenge will be the same – to praise, encourage, inspire, admire, build up, thank and appreciate your husband. But each week I will give you different ways to express your praise. Feel free to tweak it for what you think is best for your husband.

JR Miller writes “So it is in the dark hours of a man’s life, when burdens press, when sorrows weigh like mountains upon his soul, when adversities have left him crushed and broken, or when he is in the midst of fierce struggles which try the strength of every fibre of his manhood, that all the radiance and glory of a true wife’s strengthful love shine out before his eyes. Only then does he recognize in her God’s angel of mercy.”

Let’s be angels of mercy to our husbands. We may think they are filled with confidence and strength but they are only human. They have insecurities, fears, failures, burdens and cares that we do not always slow down to recognize. We lose our tenderness in the hustle and bustle of life and this month let’s slow down and really see our husband’s with fresh eyes.

It’s tempting to make Valentine’s Day all about ourselves – but let’s pursue being selfless and living according to Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”(NIV)

Week 1 starts TODAY! Look for ways to praise your husband verbally. Praise him in front of the kids, friends, family, co-workers, on facebook, tweet it – get praise out anyway you can! Try to mention something noteworthy he has done – in his role as provider, father, husband, lover, or friend. If the thought of trying to come up with one terrifies you, then pray right now that God will give you new eyes to see your husband as God does. Then open your mouth and say something kind and uplifting to your husband today and tomorrow and the next day until Valentine’s Day arrives!(if you want a devotional to go along with this Nancy Leigh Demoss has an amazing Marriage Pdf here)

Week 2 January 26th – This week we will be a little more creative with our praise. I will give you many ideas of fun things you can do to praise your husband such as surprising him with a love message on the mirror, a message packed in his lunch, using sidewalk chalk to write on the driveway, write a poem, making a toast to him at dinner with friends etc. Get creative with your selflessness!

Week 3 February 2nd – Pursue intimacy and place the intimate needs of your spouse above your own. Seek to “kiss him like you mean it” every single day this week! Solomon 5:16 says “His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely.” Paula Rinehart says that for many men, “Sex is like a silent cheer.” Our men feel stronger, more capable, and built up when we respond to their advances with a smile. “Be available, agreeable and interested” (~Linda Dillow) Give a Foot massage, back rub, shower together, be creative!

Week 4 February 9th – Women love romance, chocolate and flowers on Valentines Day. Do you know what your husband wants? Ask him! Let me make a suggestion as to what a majority of men want even if they aren’t willing to say it: a great tasting, looking, smelling home cooked meal and home cooked dessert, you pursuing him for a night of passion (remember you are married – HAVE fun! God created passion for us married folk! lol!) or a letter expressing all the things you admire about him. One of these things he would surely enjoy. Which of the three does your husband need from you right now?

“When you touch your husband’s deepest need something good almost always happens!”~ Dr. Emerson Eggerich

So I challenge you today to not just show your husband you love him but show him that you LIKE him!

I want to invite bloggers to link-up if you are participating in this challenge. If you are not a blogger – please leave a comment below to let me know that you have committed to the challenge!