Welcome back to the
Messy Beautiful Love*Book Club!
Today we move into chapters 11 & 12 and Monday we complete the book club!
Our final guest for this series is Misty and she is a part of the Good Morning Girls Leadership Team.
Misty is a Daughter of THE King, Texas girl always, Navy brat at heart, loving Fisherman’s wife, blessed homeschooling mother of 2, author of Beautiful Ashes and founder of Marriage, Motherhood and Missions. She is passionate about being real throughout all of life’s struggles, successes and dreams. Her heart is full of ideas and passions, but the hours in her day never multiply to get it all done. Misty loves writing and reading in her spare time. Music and photography are favorite past times of hers as well.
Each day is a gift from God.
What we do with that gift is solely up to us.
Though we don’t know what each day will hold, God has a purpose for everything that will come our way. We may not understand why some things happen, but God does and with His direction and strength we can glorify Him through it all.
In chapter 11, Darlene writes about seizing the day and encourages us to make the most of every moment because none of us know what lies ahead in our future. The little things that bug us today, we may miss in the future.
Cherishing the moments of each of my days is extremely important to me.
My husband is 17 years older than I and I know that unless Christ returns to take us home together, someday all I will have left are the memories of today. I want those memories to be precious to me, not full of things I regret or time I wasted.
There are situations throughout our marriages that will frustrate or disappoint us, but how we handle them is important. While it may seem frustrating to put the toilet seat down or place the dirty laundry in the hamper, one day we may wish we could do these things, just one more time.
Frustration over our husband forgetting the soccer game start time or our birthday, may seem disappointing or nerve racking, but what if we stopped and whispered a prayer of thanks that we have our husband by our side?
I believe that seizing the day and cherishing every moment, all starts with counting the gifts each day holds. I’ve used a simple notebook to keep track of the gifts I find in my day and I’ve used Ann Voskamp’s devotional as well.
No matter how you count your daily gifts, I believe that by opening our eyes and hearts to see and acknowledge the gifts God gives us, we will truly be seizing each day that God blesses us with.
Darlene shares an important truth in chapter 12.
Having a best friend is truly a God thing.
Not everyone has one and it’s even less likely in this day and age, that wives consider their husband to be their best friend.
I was in fact one of those wives who did not consider my husband my best friend.
I didn’t confide in him about anything of importance for many reasons. My husband was not aware of struggles I was facing because he didn’t understand my past, due to the fact that I hadn’t healed enough to share it openly…I was fearful of how he would respond and I didn’t want him getting too close because I was afraid of being hurt again.
After going through serious difficulties and struggles in our first 6 years of marriage, God worked a miracle in both of us. He saved our marriage when no one thought it was possible. With our 10 year anniversary coming in 2015, I’m still amazed at the fact that God brought us to this place.
As Darlene mentioned in her book, I can now trust my husband with my emotions. I know without a doubt he stands behind me and desires the best things for me in my life and my ministries. What a blessing this is to me and what a long road it was to get here, but God is good and it is by His grace alone that I am able to say that my husband is my best friend today.
As our husband’s help meet, we need to ensure that we have the qualities of being a best friend to them.
They need to know we support them.
They need to know our focus is on them and our home.
They need to know they can trust and confide in us.
Most importantly though, our husband needs to know he is respected.
God has given our husband a big responsibility in being accountable for the spiritual side of their families and the decisions they make regarding them. While we may not always agree with our husband’s decisions 100% of the time, it is our responsibility to support him unless he goes specifically against God’s word. It is during these disagreements that we can take our concerns to the throne of God and when we lay them at His feet (instead of arguing or trying to take care of it ourselves), we allow God the opportunity to perform a miracle and God can change our husband’s heart. I’ve been blessed to see God do this in my marriage a few times over the last 10 years.
Having your husband as your best friend takes a lot of work.
Here’s 4 Ways to Become Your Husband’s Best Friend:
- Start by making a list of the qualities you look for in a friend.
- Add attributes or actions that you know are important to your husband.
- Work on cultivating these qualities in yourself and visualizing them in your marriage relationship.
- Seek the Lord in prayer asking specifically for wisdom, strength and perseverance.
Every day with our husband is a gift and we need to make the most of each one. I’m praying for each of you that God would bless you, your husband and your marriage. God’s desire is that your marriage would be a picture of Christ and the church, and that is also part of my prayer for each of you today.
No marriage is outside of God’s miracle working abilities, so if you’re struggling in your marriage, don’t give up hope. God is on your side and is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that we can ask or think!
Misty, Beautiful Ashes
Thank you Misty for being with us here today!
Join the Discussion:
1. If your husband was suddenly gone would you live with regrets? If so, what needs to be said or done to change things today?
2. Is your husband your best friend?
3. What are some ways that you can improve the friendship between you and your husband?